There was once a young lad named Oswald Ogglethworp. He was not oafish, obese, or obtusely ordinary. He was the opposite of these, in fact. He often played Olo with his adroit android, apparently named Andrew.
Andrew was an android, as was affirmed above, and appeared, in an abstract sense, in an appearance like to R2-D2. He had accepted his attitude as android to Oswald, and as far as androids go, he was apathetically content.
Oswald owned an obfuscated volume of ordinary and ancient history, titled The Annals of an Airplane Aviator in an Ancient Area, by Humphrey Holtzheimer. Holtzheimer had had a hair-raising life, full of hair-breadth escapes and humongous harrows (being an agriculturalist (which is another word for a farmer), he had had horribly humongous harrows). However, after renouncing agriculture, Holtzheimer had had nothing to do, so, with a heavy heart and a hart on a halter, he h’arrived at the airport and presented himself to a hulking official, who hinted that Holtzheimer had had an alternate life in an alternate Marvel universe. This has never been proved.
Oswald was mostly content, at least for most anyone marooned on a maroon marble map-less island. (Did I forget to mention that before? He was marooned on a maroon marble map-less island). Andrew the android didn’t care how marooned he was, as long as he could play Olo with Oswald.
Oswald also wrote symphonic symphonies for overreaching orchestras and grew orchids in oval bowling balls. The orchids were not really orchids, but daisies. They had only told Oswald they were orchids to ensure a place on the oval bowling ball, since Oswald adored anything that alliterated with his epithet of obfuscacity. He also couldn’t tell apart daisies and orchids.
This tale shall end here for the present, yet perhaps in the penultimate present I shall pen more precisely a paramount amount of Oswalds poetic adventures and pithy proverbs.
Karl Bickerstaff
P.S. Oswald was occasionally confused by the obfuscation of word meaning. The author has faithfully recorded this.
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